Kent Hovind's Doctoral Dissertation now on the web

Started by AHPMB, December 15, 2009, 12:27:58 AM

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For those of you not already aware.  Professional creationist liar and convicted tax cheat Kent Hovind's doctoral dissertation was recently leaked to the internet.  Hovind has long done his best to keep this document under wraps and it's not hard to see why.  It's easily one of the greatest works of unintentional comedy ever put to paper, 102 pages of pure hilarity.  This document demonstrates just how loose the standards are for Patriot University, whose campus is an illustrious double-wide trailer that also serves as the house of its President and founder.

Just a few things I noticed as someone who has submitted documents for peer review:

1.  He starts his dissertation, and remember this is supposed to be a formal monograph with, Hello my name is Kent Hovind.

2.  The vast majority of it is un-sourced, and in fact he cites one of his biggest sources in the introduction as his own radio show.  In other words, his research is listening to himself talk.

3.  Liberal use of exclamation points, again in a formal dissertation.

4.  Blatant and childish ad hominems, such as commenting on the weight of Darwin's grandfather Erasmus.

5.  A collection of nearly every ridiculous fallacy and misunderstanding of science that has made Hovind our favorite nut-job, with exception of his notion that a massive sphere of ice floated in space over the earth. 

Read it for yourself, and as you do, just keep telling yourself that this is supposed to be a doctoral dissertation.  Stop occasionally and imagine peers at Harvard, Oxford, M.I.T. or Caltech reading this thing.  Try to picture Kent before a committee.  You'll be pissing yourself in not time

http://88.80.16.63/leak/kent-hovind-doctoral-dissertation.pdf

Is it legit?
...Wait, I mean... Everyone could write some poorly formulated, badly researched and straight out lying crap and it would look like Hovind's but is this the real thing?

Having read through it, I concede it might be a fake but there are some factors that make me think it's real.  First off, the length.  It's just over 100 pages.  That's a lot of work for a fake.  The last spat over his dissertation was years ago, so why would someone go to such lengths now, for a guy that's already in prison.  Second, the font.  This was clearly typed up on a typewriter, which would be consistent with the time Kent supposedly wrote the thing.  In fact, Kent cites who his typist was.  I would think a fake would have been written on word processing software, unless the person faking it would incredibly dedicated.  Three, whoever wrote this is intimately familiar with Kent Hovind's views, this thing reads like a condensed version of all his video lectures.  So again, if this is a hoax, the person writing has obsessively studied Hovind enough to sound like him on paper flawlessly, and dedicated enough time to write 100 pages worth of it.  That just doesn't seem likely. 

So it could be a hoax, but the level of detail here to me indicates that it is likely legitimate.

QuoteThis was clearly typed up on a typewriter, which would be consistent with the time Kent supposedly wrote the thing.

Actually, it's obviously a dot matrix computer printout, which is consistent with both the time it was written and Hovind's own comments about it. This would mean that, if it is a hoax, they got a period printer AND the software to print properly on it, further making a hoax unlikely.

It is consistent with this report:

http://www.noanswersingenesis.org.au/bartelt_dissertation_on_hovind_thesis.htm

(Of course, a hoaxer would try to make it consistent with such reports.)

Also, I recall that NCSE has a copy, and they are prohibited from releasing it. But maybe they could at least verify if the one on WikiLeaks is legitimate?

Holy shit!
That reads like something I wrote back in first grade. Just with more spelling errors.

It is legitimate. Along with NCSE holding a copy, someone on PZ Myers' blog reported that he was the source:

Quote
This is a copy of the original I obtained from Patriot University back around 1999. I asked Hovind for permission to publish it on the web, but he refused.

I did send copies to a few select people for scholarly purposes, because Hovind didn't say I couldn't distribute it and he never asked for the copy back.

I know this is a copy of mine because it has the page number count by tens that I wrote in the bottom right corner.

I counted the pages because Hovind had claimed his "dissertation" was 250 pages. I asked him about this in the email exchange I had with him, and he said it was continually "growing" and would be published as a book soon. To my knowledge no such book was ever published.

I am quite sure I got the only copy in existence when PU mailed it to me because it came with a picture cut out of a magazine and affixed to page 79 or so with transparent tape. I mean, who does that in a real dissertation?

Original blog posting: http://scienceblogs.com/pharyngula/2009/12/kent_hovinds_doctoral_disserta.php#comments
The name is Skip Evans, and the quote above is from Comment #110.
"Did you know that the hole's only natural enemy is the pile?"
"Dead Poets Society has destroyed a generation of educators."
  --The Simpsons, "Special Edna"

I was wondering why the page numbers were handwritten.

Quote from: valvatica on December 15, 2009, 11:25:38 AM
It is legitimate. Along with NCSE holding a copy, someone on PZ Myers' blog reported that he was the source:

Original blog posting: http://scienceblogs.com/pharyngula/2009/12/kent_hovinds_doctoral_disserta.php#comments
The name is Skip Evans, and the quote above is from Comment #110.

PZ himself said in the comments he's seen the NCSE copy, and this one is identical.

December 15, 2009, 11:43:21 AM #9 Last Edit: December 15, 2009, 11:48:15 AM by surhotchaperchlorome
EDIT:
Disregard that last point.
I got it. :D
I can't wait to read through it.
I need a good laugh. :)
"When the mob and the press and the whole world tell you to move, your job is to plant yourself like a tree beside the river of truth, and tell the whole world—'No. You move.'"
-Captain America, Amazing Spider-Man 537

No no, that's the way it's supposed to be. It's a product of Kent after all.

Quote from: AHPMB on December 15, 2009, 12:27:58 AM
For those of you not already aware.  Professional creationist liar and convicted tax cheat Kent Hovind's doctoral dissertation was recently leaked to the internet.  Hovind has long done his best to keep this document under wraps and it's not hard to see why.  It's easily one of the greatest works of unintentional comedy ever put to paper, 102 pages of pure hilarity.  This document demonstrates just how loose the standards are for Patriot University, whose campus is an illustrious double-wide trailer that also serves as the house of its President and founder.

Just a few things I noticed as someone who has submitted documents for peer review:

1.  He starts his dissertation, and remember this is supposed to be a formal monograph with, Hello my name is Kent Hovind.
Not only that, but it labels that part as the "introduction".
Aren't formal papers like this supposed to start with an abstract?
"When the mob and the press and the whole world tell you to move, your job is to plant yourself like a tree beside the river of truth, and tell the whole world—'No. You move.'"
-Captain America, Amazing Spider-Man 537

Quote from: MrBogosity on December 15, 2009, 08:54:05 AM
Actually, it's obviously a dot matrix computer printout, which is consistent with both the time it was written and Hovind's own comments about it. This would mean that, if it is a hoax, they got a period printer AND the software to print properly on it, further making a hoax unlikely.

Whoops good catch, it is a dot-matrix print-out.  I was looking at the font, but the old word processors did type just like that.

Eugenie Scott just responded to my email, saying it looks like the copy they have (but they did NOT get it from the NCSE). It's the real deal, folks!

You have email exchanges with Eugenie Scott? That hot science momma?!
I'll put you on my list of stuff I watch with envious eyes. >_o